On 2009-12-30 A. Omelianchuk, Minneapolis, MN wrote: This book has two covers to choose from; the first edition containing the subtitle, ´How pornography is transforming our lives, our relationships, and our families.´ The second edition substitutes the word ´damaging´ for ´transforming, and this is more accurate, as Paul uses most of her book to tell the stories of men and women who view and consume pornography to their detriment-whether they know it or not.
The virtue of Paul´s book is that it captures the habits of porn use by real people, and does not immediately take on abstract issues like freedom of speech, obscenity law, and defining what exactly pornography is. She interviews a number of people who are frank about their experience with porn ranging from largely positive to mostly negative. She retains their language and does not shy away from using their words and descriptions to capture the full effect of pornography on how people think and communicate about sex. Thus the reader is left to be shocked and shocked again by what becomes obvious if it isn´t obvious already: pornography is utterly vulgar.
The inclusion of vulgarity is very important for Paul who never really defines what pornography is, but gives the impression that whatever it may be it is something that inherently degrading. Vulgarity, however, doesn´t simply mean something ´gross´ or ´offensive´ is on display. It also denotes something stupid or low-brow, lacking refinement, class, or decency. Those that peddle it are rightly stigmatized and those that consume it are naturally ashamed of it at least to the point where they feel the need to keep it hidden from others.
Paul illuminates many contradictory attitudes about pornography held by both men and women that are maddening to contemplate. Men will say it doesn´t affect them, but will admit to using it 5 hours a week ´to get off.´ They say it doesn´t cost them anything, and yet the industry makes more money than Hollywood and professional sports combined. Its just fantasy, not reality, though there is an ever increasing demand for porn stars to be photographed in more and more degrading fashions. Women want to be ´cool with it´ and let ´boys be boys´ but they feel devalued when their partner brings pornified fantasies into the bedroom. They know that every man ´looks´ but that does not stop the feelings of inadequacy and betrayal. Men think women ´should get over it´ or that they will ´never understand´ but many feel ashamed of how much they need it and feel tormented over how out of control their use has become. Sex therapists advocate couples using pornography together to spice up the love life, but many couples experience a lack of intimacy and deadened libido afterwards.
Paul does not advocate censorship, but certainly does not see pornography as a form of politically protected ´speech.´ She argues that such a notion is ridiculous in light of the fact that pornography is really a commodity of an industry that commercializes and sells its products with no regard to the social good much like the tobacco industry sells cigarettes. The effects of porn on children and teenagers, not to mention marriages, are ignored while huge profits are turned by amoral corporations. Regulation of industry does not contradict or mitigate the political rights every American citizen is entitled to under the First Amendment. Such confusion, created by the porn industry itself, could even be applied to prostitution absurdly making it a form of ´free demonstration´ protected by law.
Pamela Paul´s book is not for the faint at heart and is not recommended for anyone under eighteen or anyone trying to exit a pornography addiction. However, it is a much needed book for raising the awareness of anyone who is seeking answers to questions about what constitutes a true sexual morality and a truly good life.
. And summed up by saying Confronts vulgarity, raises awareness. Currently Pornified: How Pornography Is Transforming Our Lives, Our Relationships, and Our Families has an overall rating of 6 over 10.
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Times Books claimed Welcome to Porn America. Pornography, once the taboo vice that no one dared to mention, has become part of our daily lives-affordable, accessible, anonymous, and, increasingly, acceptable. The all-pornography, all-the-time mentality is everywhere-not just in cybersex and Playboy magazine but in mainstream magazines, in Paris Hilton+s saleability as a celebrity, in the advice columns of women+s magazines, and on the bestseller lists. But, even more striking, porn has become a big part of the personal lives of many Americans. Critically acclaimed author Pamela Paul argues that as porn has become more pervasive, it has changed our marriages and families as well as our children+s ideas of sex and sexuality. In the dozens of interviews and a nationwide Harris poll that she conducted as part of her research for this book, Paul exposes how porn has infiltrated our lives. From a wife agonizing over the late-night hours her husband spends on porn sites to parents stunned to learn that their twelve-year-old son has seen a hardcore porn film, we see the costs and consequences of pornography, as intimacy is replaced by fantasy and emotional isolation. Pornified is an insightful, shocking, and important investigation that will rekindle the debate on how and where pornography meets the public eye.
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